I Lost a Kidney and Gained a Friend: Renee Farr’s Kidney Donation Story

On November 30, 2025, I was sitting on my couch scrolling through Facebook when I came across a post about a man who desperately needed a kidney.

It was a Sunday. Earlier that day, I had been at church, where the message was about the Good Samaritan and what it means to be willing to be inconvenienced in your own life to help someone else. I didn’t think much about it at the time. Then I saw his video.

He was a complete stranger to me, but something about his story stopped me. I could see the desperation in his eyes. He wasn’t asking for something small. He needed a kidney, and he needed someone willing to step forward. And for some reason, I couldn’t just scroll past it.

I’m someone who has always felt called to help people when I can, so I started looking into what living kidney donation actually involved.

This wasn’t my first experience with organ donation. My first husband passed away at a young age, and I was able to donate his organs. Years later, I received a letter from the person who received one of his kidneys. That letter gave me a glimpse into the incredible ripple effect that organ donation can have. Something that comes from a moment of profound loss can become the gift of more time and more life for someone else.

Then my second husband’s sister needed a kidney. I told her I would look into becoming a donor, but she passed away before I could even get tested.

So when I saw that Facebook post, I think all those experiences came rushing back in a way I didn’t fully understand at the time. The next morning, I told my husband, “I’m going to look into this.”

Then I asked him the question I think anyone might ask in that situation: “Am I crazy?! I don’t even know this guy!” He looked at me and said, “No. You’re not crazy. You’re incredibly generous.” And that was really all the reassurance I needed.

I never felt afraid. Instead, I felt an unexpected sense of peace. I felt like I was supposed to at least find out if I could help.

The man from the Facebook post reached out to me. He told me that if I wanted to remain anonymous, he completely understood. But if I wanted to meet him, he would love that, too. He also told me something I’ll never forget. Even if I wasn’t a match, he said, the fact that I was willing to get tested had given him hope.

After all the testing and screening was complete, I got the call. I was a perfect match!

On June 9, 2026, we went into surgery. Two people who had been complete strangers just months earlier were now connected in a way neither of us could have imagined.

And the kidney is doing amazing! His doctors have told him his numbers look great—so great that they normally don’t see numbers that good so soon after a transplant.

I get so much joy out of hearing his updates. Every time I hear that he’s doing well, I smile. Because that kidney that used to be a part of me is now doing its job inside someone else.

But the kidney isn’t the only thing I gained from this experience. I gained a friend. That was the part I never saw coming.

The man whose desperate Facebook video first caught my attention is now someone I consider a genuinely good friend, like family. We talk, we share updates, we laugh, and we’ve built a friendship that began with something as extraordinary as one person giving another person a kidney.

I went into this thinking I was going to give someone a kidney. I never expected to gain a friendship. I never expected the experience to bring me this much joy. I never expected that something that required me to give up a part of myself would leave me feeling like I had received something, too. I lost a kidney and gained a friend.

And physically, I learned something else along the way: our bodies are incredibly resilient. The recovery was much easier than I expected. I took a few weeks off work, and by about week five, my energy had returned. Eventually, I stopped thinking about the fact that I only have one kidney. I just felt like me again.

Looking back, I realize the hardest part of this whole experience wasn’t the surgery. It was making that first decision to say, “I’m willing to find out.”

Because sometimes we think helping someone has to be convenient. We think we need to have extra time, extra money, extra energy, or some special reason to get involved. But sometimes, helping someone means being willing to be inconvenienced.

That was the message I heard at church that Sunday. I didn’t know, at the time, that I was going to be the one asked to live it.

The more I learned about kidney donation, the more I realized that it isn’t really about giving something away. It’s about giving someone a chance. A chance to feel better. A chance to make plans. A chance to spend more time with the people they love. A chance to live a healthier, fuller life.

And now, when I look at my recipient, I don’t just see someone who received my kidney. I see my friend. I see someone who was once a stranger on my phone screen and is now a person who has become part of my life.

That is the part of this story I never could have written myself. I thought I was giving away a kidney. Instead, I gained a friendship, a deeper understanding of generosity, and one of the most meaningful experiences of my life.

Kidneys were made to be shared. And there is something pretty amazing about knowing that a little piece of you is out there helping someone you care about live their life.

Sometimes, the things we give away are the very things that give us something back.

About the Author

Renee enjoys sharing her experience to help others understand the impact of living donation and the incredible connections that can come from simply choosing to help someone in need.

Renee’s career has also centered around helping others. She works with babies and toddlers who are blind or have low vision, helping young children and their families navigate the earliest stages of life with vision loss. Her work and her experience as a kidney donor have given her a deep appreciation for the power of support, connection, and showing up for someone when they need it most.

When she isn’t working or sharing her kidney donation story, Renee enjoys traveling, singing in her choir, spending time with family and friends, and making the most of life—one kidney at a time. She lives near Seattle with her husband, and her two adult daughters live nearby.